Bay 2 Bay CRASHIC (classic) TheKillerAnt

Well my CoTers it has been a while since my last post and there are reasons for the break...
1. Having started a serious training program with my new coach i have been really busy, doing two sessions on the bike some days and even gym sessions on top of that...so i have been too busy to do a decent post but today it all changes :P
-Ok thats the only reason-

The Bay 2 Bay classic or should i say CRASHIC...
110kms of undulating coastal roads with some winds (not too bad, not melb-ballarat standard) and arthurs seat on each lap...
As i turned up to race, got my numbers, got ready at my car etc. the news was put out that the starting order had been reversed, so i had to rush to get ready and on the line (never good). Anyways ill refer back to this later.
The race started with me feeling like a race horse on steroids, i felt great, like the strongest rider in my bunch, sitting there just tapping out the bunch tempo and feeling strong and fit...as we left rosebud and had only ridden about 3-4kms we hit the first climb and it really was more of a climb than it first appeared so i went up to the front of the bunch (3,4,5th wheels) and after about 4 or 5kms of climbing we only had about 20riders left in the lead group and we had only covered around 10kms!! I was riding the big ring up that first climb and even for me (who climbs pretty well) i was riding it at around 91-93% so no wonder so many got dropped...
anyway the decent is when things got a little more NEWS WORTHY ;)

We started the decent and the pace was pretty quick, somewhere around 60-65km/h, my orca with the new zipps on it felt super fast, i was really relaxed and comfortable heading around the bends, and that was when i noticed (at around 4th wheel in the bunch) some speed advisory signs for cars on a slightly dodgy looking left hander. I covered my brakes and got reading to take what i thought wasa semi tight sweeper...but as i got nearer to it the few riders in front of me slowed right down and i went flying up the inside of them with both front and rear tyres locked and the bike all out of shape. I went crashing (still upright) into the left side of a guy trying to use him to stay upright, he bounced off me, i still had the bike Joseba Beloki (spelling??) style out of control and smacked back into him, this time, at around 35-45km/h my front wheel (i think) touched his shoe (or possibly his frame, back wheel) and i fully flipped over and landed firstly on my hip and then slid down the road on my back with the bike still clipped in to my shoes and being held up in the air like a turtle on its shell.

In a panic i watched as the bunch road around me (still on my back and facing up the hairpin) and continued on their journey, i tried to get up, checked my wheels (which have not been marked AT ALL somehow), put my chain back on, grabbed my bidons, clipped back in and raced off in pursuit of the bunch.
In a bit of a rage i was flying, i had a few dodgy moments on the next few corners as i was shaken up a bit but none the less it wasa race so i was going for it...
The next problem
As soon as i hit the next hill i changed to a easier gear and found that i had bent the derailer hanger badly and it was rubbing my spokes, i had to get off and quickly bend it back myself, check my wheels again and re-mount and keep chasing. I chased for 40kms+ and passed and dropped around 8-10 dropped riders and even got the bunch within sight by myself but as the roads quickened i quickly found that i was loosing time and my right hip was really hurting.
The wash-up
I got my elbow, back and hip treated in a st johns ambulance thingy, and limped back to my car for the 1.5hr journey home. I recieved a few text messages from CoT members but really nothing could cheer me up. All my prep and good form and i pissed it away in a completly stupid, amatuer move. I didnt need to sit that far up the front and if i was further back i could have copied the bunches lines through those corners but as i was so close to the pointy end and feeling so confident i lost my usually great concentration and thoguht i some how could out manouvre the other guys and fly around the corner at warp speed. (but what would that have proved anyway) i am an idiot. As the great george costanza from seinfeld once said, "i am costanza, lord of the idiots" i feel his pain ;)
Bike
My bike is completly fine. Gunsle straightened the derailer hanger and apart from that me and my kit took the beating.
the bike has...
1. a few more scratches on the rear derailer (who cares)
2. a few more scratches to the right pedal (who cares)
3. a few more scratches to the right hand brake hood (who cares)
4. a nasty tear on my $500 (you check the price if you dont believe me) carbon railed Fizik Aliante (i care)
Me
Le tour jersey is f*cked, massive whole and rips on the back of it
Le tour santini knicks bloodied and torn
I wore a big hole through my bonds singlet from sliding down the road on my back
Limar 909 helmet is dented and scratched
Specialized S-Works BOA shoes have a few little marks on them
My hip is f*cked
My elbow is f*cked
My neck is f*cked
My back is f*cked
I cant sleep and then gunsle rings me at 8am and tells me off for sleeping in when all ive done all night (again) is get around 30minutes sleep and then i wake up sore.
My pride and 15km/h or above 100% bike handling skills are ruined.
REASONS FOR THE CRASH
I didnt have time to put on my long pearl izumi socks (i cant crash with them on)
It was the 13th of August
I didnt have my gloves on (but didnt even mark them)
I wasnt concentrating

I also missed Jessica Alba's hosting of the VMA's and she was on my mind...

Im an idiot (anyone who knows me, knows this to be true)
I think i had too much pressure in my tubulars, they locked instantaneously
Im not a great speller
Im racing in shit grades where i feel beta than the others, arrogant and stuff and thats never good.
Big Cam f*cked my bike and its never been the same.

Thanks for reading guys, I hope this was entertaining...almost as entertaining as me watching Ben and Shauns g/f arguing over some femanism stuff (netball, basketball, football) on sunday night, was a classic head butting affair. Enjoy the pix :)